Putting my “proverbial money” where my mouth is.
Here goes.
Kai has rightly said that I need to put myself in a position whereby I can't wriggle my way out of this. If I just keep saying im going to do it, but dont commit to it, it'll never happen. Im too good at procrastinating. Therefore I need to declare it as loudly as possible and then buckle down and get started before I become someone who talks a lot but never delivers.
"It" in this case is the story I mentioned in previous posts. "Pawprints" now has a basic outline, written and everything, and I have enough to work with to get started on writing. So im going to do it.
Watch this space. MAKE me continue, help me finish. Bonk me on the head if need be..(though id prefer bribes). I "am" going to write this story.
Whats in a name?
So, now I have a title for my story. Or, to be more accurate I should probably say "working" title. Its something to go on, at least. So, for now, the story is called "Pawprints". I'm not sure why but I sort of like it, and it seems to fit.
Also, interestingly...(well, for me), the scene that I thought was going to start off the story isnt going to start it off at all, and now the starting scene involves two totally differant characters. Who are busy writing themselves in my head...arguing actually...and I'm almost wary about starting to type out the scene in case they really go to town once they get onto the page. So if you hear about a freak disappearance of a wannabe writer in Lanark, IT WAS THEM WHAT DID IT!!!!!
Scratching
Its started, it seems. The scratching and clawing on the inside of my head, in the nooks and crannies...where the ideas breed. All it took was getting a light thump on the arm, I guess...
Ideas are forming. Slowly, surely and, as usual, in no particular order. I have an opening scene, or at least the seed of one, yet I also have a scene that I don't know where it should go and at least two conversations between characters taking shape. I haven't really done anything. I've only just started reading the books Kai loaned me, I only know about three of the characters (and only two of those by name) and I don't even know where the story would be going yet. That doesn't seem to be making much of a differance to the melon on my shoulders, though. While walking round the supermarket, buying dinner, my brain stumbled on a little piece of lore for this fictional, not quite fantasy/not quite reality, world in my head. Its a small detail, and its not exactly unsullied originality, but it fits, and one of the scenes I've been pondering has changed drasticly because of it.
One thing is for sure, its nice to be able to think about something other than the emotional hurt of recent weeks. I'm not saying the black mood has lifted, but it has to fight for dominance in my thoughts now, and thats a step forward, yes?
Don’t Be Afraid….
Be very, very afraid...
I'm back.....
Yeah, bet you thought this corner of the web was so covered in dust that it would never rise again, such was the weight. But, like Balrogs and David Cameron, there are fouler things than orcs in the deep places of the world. And one of them is my blog.
I'm about to start research and planning for this years Nanowrimo, since trying to jump straight into it last year went SO well...and Kai is prodding me to join the V7N blogging challenge thing, so you might see more of me from now on.
Now, theres your warning, the scary music has started...let me get my hockey mask and my axe....I'll give you a head start.....
Define “Irony”……
When a high ranking member of a racist, xenophobic, Holocaust denying Fascist organisation calls other people "thugs" because they threw eggs at him. Personally I think he got off lightly with only a few eggs. Considering the evil that this criminal (yup, hes got a criminal record for inciting racial hatred) spouts from his mouth, he doesn't have much right to point fingers at anyone else.
I guess theres also a certain amount of horrific irony that members of that same loathsome organisation have somehow managed to get themselves elected to the European Parliament. The very idea turns my stomach.
All those veterans who fought, and saw their comrades fall, on the beaches of Normandy must be wondering what the hell went wrong....Didn't we go to war against Hitler to end the evils of xenophobic fascism?
That ol’ Torch
Meeting up with an old flame isn't always as fun as it sounds. It starts off great, but then sometimes the emotions and memories mix and then it F'ing sucks.
Just thought I'd mention it.
Oh, and to all those who waltz though life all happy and bouncy with everything falling into place and love and happiness stretching before you like a f'ing meadow in front of F'ing bunnies.....I hate you.
Now im going to go curl up in a ball for a bit.
World of Stuff-Craft-Thing
My dear friend Kai posted the following on her blog, so Im doing the same. Same rules, same restrictions and so on. My only caveat for this is that since I am about as Craft-Inclined as a hampster, the thing you get if you respond to this will most likely be a short story. Since I can do those. Think of it as a way of incentivising me to write more.
The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! my choice for you.
This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make you. But I certainly will try.
- What I create will be just for you.
- It will be done this year (2009)
- You have no clue what its going to be,it may be a story, it may be poetry. I might draw or paint something. I may make you something and mail it to you. Who knows? not you, that’s for sure!
The ‘catch’ is that you have to post this in your journal as well. Come on, we can all make something!
Alas poor Beardie, I knew him well…
A facefuzz of infinite jest....
Yes, I know that the line is "Alas poor Yorick, I knew him, Horatio,,," before anyone starts quibbling.
My beard is gone. It is an ex-beard. It is...no more....it is pushing up the daisies.
I shaved it. I fancied a change, and Id been going on about thinking about maybe, perhaps contemplating shaving it off, so on Saturday I just went ahead and did it.
So its gone. My face is oddly smooth, apart from the shaving cuts. Well, its been a while since I shaved that part of my face, frankly its been a while since I last SAW that part of my face, so its taking a while to get used to shaving it properly.
So far most peoples reactions have been positive. I havent seen anyone collapsing in hysterics. The worst thing ive heard people say (at least to my newly smoothed face) is "It makes you look younger."
I can live with that.
Glue, glue everywhere….and all the fingers did stick
Isn't glue fun? It smells weird, it gets everywhere...and it resolutely fails to glue what its supposed to. Okay, thats a lie...Plastic Glue is great..i have very little trouble with that stuff, but superglue is a pain in the unpronouncables. Its much better at glueing my fingers than it is anything else. (fans of Dog Soldiers may now feel free to replay that scene with the intestines and superglue if the really want to...)
So why am I jabbering on about glue. Well, its because for the last two weeks ive been glueing models together in a frenzy of modelling joy. On a whim, just after New Year, I sauntered into Games Workshop to see what its like these days, since the last time I was there was about 2nd year at Uni...after that I couldnt afford it and I didnt like what they were doing with the game systems at the time.
Anyhew, I wondered in, looked around, marvelled at the quality of the models on show, goggled when I found out that most of them where plastics instead of metal (these are seriously high quality models, chatted to the staff about the good old days (one of them literally got all misty eyed when I explained that I last played 40K when it was 2nd edition), and then promptly bought the 40K starter box. I took it home, assembled the models, marveled again at how good they look, and set about testing out the new (well, new to me) rules.
I liked it. A lot. It had a lot of stuff that I remembered, and a bunch of new, better ways of doing things and explaining things that made so much sense. Of course, theres some bits that had me going "wtf?", but once I got my head round it (thanks to a phone call to Dave), I got it sorted.
The upshot of all this is that I went and bought more minatures, enough Space Marines to make the army that comes in the starter box into a game legal force, and a game legal Chaos Space Marine Army, (im quite proud that I managed not to go buying a ton of Eldar...I have lots of that from the first time round back at Mums) and ive been assembling all those models every evening since I bought them. it takes longer than you'd think. So many of them are plastics, with lots and lots of variations in pose and equipment that assembling 5 Assault Marines can take over an hour...with lots of referance back to the Codex to see what they can be equiped with in game.
In the Grim Darkness of the Far Future, There Is Only War......
And glued fingers.
Another year nearly done.
Its been moods swings aplenty this week. More than usual, anyway. With all the other stuff thats going on in my life, especially that big, scary life thing thats ive told some of you about, the last thing I was needing is for me to realise that another flippin year has managed to grind by, and that this time next week ill be 31. Grrr.
So, typically, my brain is doing its usual and reminding me that im still single (and then going into detail about all the issues Ive got that contribute to that), that im not getting any younger and all the other stuff I wanted to have done or seen. Therefore my mood has been bouncing around a bit. It doesnt seem as bad as last year...last year was one of the "big" numbers and I was NOT happy about it...but still....
Still feels like a clock.
Thing is, some things this year have gone quite well. Sure, the last month or so has be very much a WTF???? and thats not going to change for a some time...and sure this year marked another relationship that didnt work out (that was kinda a WTF too, tbh), but theres been some good times and I acheived a few things. I got a story published on a website and I got some steam on to actually start some other writing projects (just need to finish them now), Ive had lots of good times with friends...some stuff has been pretty decent, all told. It even turns out that im loving having a car and really enjoying driving it, even though the reason for buying was more neccessity than "i want to". i also bought one of Adam's paintings, an amazing piece called "Crowd of One" that I think is just brilliant, so simple and so evocative.
This next year is going to be hard. Big scary life stuff is happening and is going to continue for a long time yet. I just hope that everything turns out all right in the end, and that when the dust has settled everything and everyone will be okay again.
Then maybe Ill do something about that clock.